don’t go home: the permanent trip part 2

So you’ve decided on the location of your permanent trip. Or if you’re like us, the location chose you in that mystical way that places can do. You’ve used Tip 1 and began the process of facing your fears. You’re almost there.

The plan has landed or you’ve pulled the car up to your destination. The keys to the new house are nestled safely in the palm of your hand. The fears are trying to get to you, but you’re keeping them at bay in that cozy Kleenex box. You’re contemplating finding the local grocery store to get another cake to help you through those breathtaking first seconds, minutes, hours of living somewhere new. It’s time for Tip 2.

Tip 2: You’ve made the decision to uproot yourself and plant yourself somewhere new. Whether it’s 5 miles away or 5,000 miles away from the place you used to call home, it doesn’t matter. What matters is what you do with this new place; this new location.

In situations like this, it’s all about finding a new normal. Making this new place your new home. I know a lot of people who have relocated many miles away from everything they consider familiar and normal. I’m one of those people who have relocated many miles away from everything I once considered familiar and normal.

It’s hard to do this. But take a deep breath and practice this simple concept. Call the new place home. Every time you tell a story or make a reference to where you used to live, don’t call that place home anymore. Call it by its name. Save the word “home” for this new place, this relocated place.

Think of it as desensitizing yourself to the newness of this strange and interesting place you’ve decided to move to. It’s okay if you’ve only signed on for a temporary relocation. Where I’m at, there are several folks on a 2 year contract. This isn’t where they’ll retire at or where they’ll raise grandchildren at. But it is their new home. It is the place they’ll spend days and nights on end and where they’ll make new friends.

If you constantly call the place you left your home, it’s going to be that much harder to settle into the groove of this new place. It’ll be harder to find things you like about it and you can forget about feeling at home here.

Sometimes you have to fake it until you make it. Call the new place home. Take the plunge into the permanent and see where it takes you. See if you can find a home here in this unusual and frightening permanent trip.

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